When a dream and reality collide….



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Life is full of big decisions.  Especially when you have children. What school do I put them in?  Which doctor should I choose?  Should I put them in extra activities such as sports or music even if they really aren’t a fan? Do they really need that new video game?  How much life insurance do I need? What is the best decision to make to protect them?  Every decision that I made during those formative years was a tough one, and while I don’t think I did a horrible job, there are some things that I really wouldn’t mind a “do over” on.

laura and amanda baking cookies

This photo is probably 20 years old.  The girls loved making cookies especially at Christmas.  That was the fun of having girls; dressing them up for holidays and special events.  This was the days of big hair, and small paychecks.  I scrimped and saved and worked two jobs to support my girls.  Money was very tight.

stenciled popsicle stick desk set

But I made sure that they had everything they needed.  The girls never knew that money was short.  They knew that they were safe, secure, and that they were very protected.

laura and amanda

Since my girls have grown up and moved out, the house has become a lot quieter.  Sometimes that is a good thing, as now my husband and I can relax in an un-drama-fied environment.  If you are familiar with raising girls, then I’m sure you are familiar with the drama.  Every day was a new episode in their own personal reality show.  While my life is a sitcom, theirs were more of a daytime soap opera with lots of angst, a bit of dramatic story line and many episodes of just plain old teenage turmoil.  My little sitcom pales in comparison to their daily theatrical melodrama.

And yes, they did grow up to be beautiful, happy individuals.  Do we miss them?  Absolutely!  The drama?  No way.

Now we are free to do what we want, when we want.  My schedule revolves around my schedule and nobody else’s.  If we wanted to run around the house naked, we could certainly do it!

…Well, actually, I don’t really want to frighten the dogs.  They are a bit high strung already.  But the point is, if we wanted to, we certainly could!

rv camping suzys sitcom

A few months ago, I announced that my husband and I will be selling everything, moving into our RV and traveling the country.  This plan was five years in the making.  You can read about it here.  So, it shouldn’t have been a surprise to the girls when we told them the house is now on the market and we are getting ready to go.  But I think both girls thought we were just having big dreams.

Drama ensued.

What would they do if they needed us for something?  Who could they depend on for help?  What if their car broke down.  What if they had a bad day and just needed someone to talk to?

Yep, maybe I protected them a bit too much.  Remember the do-over thing?

atlanta traffic

Atlanta has been our home for most of the girl’s lives.  The oldest now lives in Oklahoma, but our youngest still lives in the Atlanta area.  While we love to be around family, we feel that we need to move on with our lives and separate ourselves from the corporate atmosphere, the daily commute, the crowds, and stress associated with living in and near a big city.  It is our dream to travel.

flock of geese

We are looking forward to living in the moment.  We want to see the country first hand and enjoy traveling while we are still healthy enough to do so.  This crowd of geese is the closest I want to come to a traffic jam in the near future.

But how do we make our girls feel protected and secure from a distance?

Fortunately with the ease of the internet and phone service, we can easily face-time them anytime they would like. Daily contact is now possible in this big world, made very simple with the internet.  I am grateful for that.   And there is the website thing.  I’ve started a new website called The Traveling Sitcom, where they can easily follow our journeys.  We would never be more than a phone call away.

rv in carabelle florida

Ultimately, the girls are at the point where they need to establish their own lifestyles.  And they are doing that.  But I think that with mom and dad roaming around the country, they are forced to start being more self sufficient.  And that is a good thing.  While the mom in me wants to always protect them just as I did when they were children, I know that they need to learn to take good care of themselves.  After all, it will probably not be long before both of them have children of their own to protect.

With that in mind, I did a bit of research to find information that they can use to help make their own important decisions.  The internet is wonderful isn’t it?  My girls need to learn more about disaster preparedness, more about health insurance, more about how to protect themselves and their assets.  The Protective Learning Center is a great place for them to begin gathering the information that they need in order to be ready for important decisions and become the self sufficient confident adults that I know they are.  And it gives us a little peace of mind so that we can enjoy our new life on the road.

Do you struggle with allowing your children to be more self sufficient?  Are your kids too dependent?  How are you handling it?

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{ 5 comments… add one }
  • Connie February 8, 2015, 5:06 pm

    Congratulations! Your girls will survive and will thrive but a sound “good for you” for trying to help them be well prepared for independence and the decision making that comes with it. I raised my son to be independent and I’ve never regretted it. (well, maybe a time or two when he doesn’t call as often as I like) My theory back then was that at least he wouldn’t marry young because he needed someone to take care of him. Not sure how that how that worked out but it sounded good at the time. Having been a woman who was on my own most of my adult life, I believe they will thank you in years to come.
    Hey, I live in the Atlanta Metro area and I can sympathize. I’ve had friends who have done exactly what you are doing. So, go for it and I can’t wait to follow your journey. We did a lot of traveling when we were younger and, now that it isn’t possible, I wouldn’t give up a minute of the good times we had and all we learned.

    • Susan Myers February 12, 2015, 4:45 pm

      Hi Connie!

      Thanks so much for the encouraging words! We have come to the point that at our age, we need to go ahead and do the things we dreamed of. We don’t want to have regrets when we get to old to travel. And I think the girls will love having a fun place to visit us every now and then.

      suzy

  • Penny February 4, 2015, 3:23 pm

    I think what your child might be trying to say is what about when we just need you to hold us, what you can remind your children to make them feel a little better is that plains fly in all city’s and if it were a true emergences you could be there in one to how ever many hours by flight you may be away from them at the time. I am 51 and dying, and I want my children to be the best they can be, I did not get to retire or do all those wonderful things we planed to do, so go for it and love every minute you have. I have been blessed with my children close to me, but my middle son thinks if he does not see or talk to me, I wont die, I had to call him and explain to him that it was steal going to happen, but that I sure would love to see him and his wife and all my grandchildren before I do go home to our LORD. I get to see him this week end, yah for me, my new grandson is growing so fast. I raised my boys to be independent because my hubby could not even boil water when I married him 33 yrs ago this year if I make it, I keep praying for more time and our GOD can do it if that is his plan. I do have my youngest son who will be 29 and he has to live with some one because he is scitzophantic and can not live on his own, so he lives with us, this has me so worried, I don’t think he can deal with it when I am with the LORD, I keep trying to explain that I will always be with him. you know what. enjoy your life, enjoy your children and grandchildren when you have them,,,,,,,, but always put GOD first, your girls will be fine, just remind them your a plain away. GOD bless.

  • norene February 4, 2015, 2:25 pm

    I loved the pictures. It brought back alot of good memories of when they were little.

  • Lynda February 4, 2015, 2:12 pm

    Well I definitely need to check out that website since my 23 year old is still living at home LOL I’ve always loved that picture of the girls making the cookies.

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