I’m really not a doofus. I promise.

Gosh, I have so much to blog about and so little time. Such is the season. My company is very holiday spirity and they send out literally thousands of hand-signed Christmas cards every year. So it is my job to distribute them around the company and get multiple signatures on each and every card and then to get them sent off. Fun. With a capital F. I can close my eyes right now and still see stacks of cards ingrained on the inside of my eyelids. And as I sit here typing this, they are again piling around me.

I’m thinking if I sat here too long, I might get lost in the stacks. Sometime near Christmas, the boss will say, “Where’s Suzy? I haven’t seen her in days!” A search will ensue and someone will eventually find me flattened to a pancake underneath a huge stack of Christmas cheer. Did you ever read “Flat Stanley” as a kid? That would be me. Flattened where they can now just put a stamp on my face and mail me home right along with all the Christmas cards. Hey, maybe I’ve discovered the next weight loss fad? Who knew?

Along with my current diet plan, I am hiking with my husband on the weekends using our “Jar ‘O Hikes”. Based on a book of 60 hikes around Atlanta, we pull a number out of that jar and do the corresponding hike each week. It gives us a great opportunity to see the sights of the Atlanta area that we never would have seen otherwise and also gives us an excuse to take the motorcycle out. A few weeks ago, we pulled the trail that goes on the west side of Lake Lanier. This trail is part of the Chattahoochee River National Recreation Area and is located just west of the Buford Dam which regulates Lake Lanier and the Atlanta water supply. Awesome. We went on a dam walk!

Of course, that meant that the entire hike we had to say things like, “Wonder if there is a dam store?”, “Want to eat at that dam picnic table?”, “Is there a dam restaurant here?”, “We need to get gas at the dam gas station”, “Where’s the dam map?” Yep, we are easily entertained. Dammit.

Anyway, we ran across the perfect picnic table. It sat on a peninsula that jutted out into the water. You could sit there with the lake on three sides of you. And it had a grill! So, this past weekend, we grabbed my daughter and my mom and set out on a dam picnic. Now my mom knows that I’m not the most brilliant where cooking is concerned. So she and my husband monitored me closely to be sure that I brought everything that we would need. Ice? Check. Baked beans? Check. Aluminum Foil? Check. Serving spoons? Check. Paper plates? Okay already!! Yeah, I brought it! You’d think they thought I was a total doofus or something! Of course I remembered!

So we get there to that perfect table next to the dam. And set up the grill, and threw the burgers on and arranged the table, setting out the potato salad, the baked beans, the coleslaw and condiments. And we sat and talked and enjoy the beautiful fall weather. And the burgers came off the grill and we rubbed our hands together, preparing to have an awesome meal in a beautiful setting.

and Mom said, “Where’s the plastic silverware?”

Me: ………

Me: Dam.

Sigh… so we ate with serving ladels. And I will probably never hear the end of it.

So back to Mount Christmas Card….If you don’t hear from me next week, please send someone to find me under the stacks. I’ll be the flat thing with long red hair under the mountains of spirity cheer. Ho..ho…ho.